Don't expect God to open a door that you don't have faith to walk through

It's been a month since I promised to blog my Lent adventure and how I was going to walk away at the end of 40 days closer to God.

Then, life happened.

Between being a little under the weather, midtermish things at school, drama with different organizations, and trying to stay afloat in life, I've failed miserably at both blogging and getting closer to God.

Then, today, like a ton of bricks, God hit me. (He tends to do that so I kind of just go with it...) There words literally brought tears to my eyes as I read them over and over again.

Don't expect God to open a door that you don't have faith to walk through.

For those of you who may know me personally, I'm getting ready to graduate from The University of Virginia's College at Wise with a Bachelor's in Communication. Over the past three weeks, I've applied to almost 30 jobs. Some at hospitals, some in school systems, some in offices, some as a nanny. Others are in doctor's offices and people's homes and at churches and schools. While some have said no because they're looking to hire before May, some have just ignored me. Today, I had a phone interview with a company that was ready to hire me on the spot...if I invested $275 into their company right then and there.

What?!

I can't believe I almost fell for a scam like that. And honestly, I just don't have the funds to find out if it's a for real deal or not. It would have been perfect-work from home, not have to commute, keep Harper if Erica needed a little extra help, take on another family for some extra income. It really was great...but is it a door that God has opened for someone who thinks they can pull the wool over a soon-to-be graduate's eyes and laugh on their way to the bank?

Don't expect God to open a door that you don't have faith to walk through.

Same thing goes with my relationship with Him. I've been struggling...okay, almost ignoring, my alone time. I have it here and there. I hear a worship song and I stop and close my eyes, wondering how I could have neglected the true love of my life. Then my phone buzzes and I'm brought back to the world, leaving the light and walking off less salty and more spicy than I would like. (If you'd like the definition of being "spicy" in the world, you can email me.)

Two months from yesterday, I will be walking across the stage, shaking Donna's hand, and graduating from a place I have loved so dearly for five years. God is opening doors for me. Am I going to have faith to walk through them? We aren't promised tomorrow. I'm not promised that God will smack me with a ton of bricks every time I fail.

Join me in prayer as I listen to His plan for my life. All I want is for His will to be done.